Back in England again.
It's weird for me, because of some reason I have no feeling that it's the last year. I have no feeling of a person that is going to stop going to school at the end of this. It's the same thing that happens with me when I travel between home and here. I never have the sense I am going anywhere unless it's the very first time, I don't get the whole "Ahhh! I am going to go somewhere!" that most other people seem to get every time they go to a place far away.
It just strikes me as odd that my personality seems so distant from everything. I sort of know why that is I ended up like that, but taking a step back and looking at myself as a character it just seems very blank. Kind of like Haru from the anime
Free!.
There are something that interests me, I am in a content happy sort of
state while doing it and it does keep me going, but still I don't really
know why it keeps me going, I'm really just doing it, and most of the
reason it still is going at all is because of my friends encouraging me.
If I am not enjoying it together with anyone I don't enjoy it the same
way and it just kind of works on autopilot.
I just feel like a bland Haru sinking away to hide from the world in my bathtub most of the time.
